Kathi and Katherine talk about asking for help on this week’s My Crazy Office Overtime show.
Are you able to ask for help at work when you need it?
Listen to this week’s podcast here.
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Tag: advice
Best Of: Addressing Mental Health At Work – My Crazy Office, Season 7
Kathi and Katherine talk about mental health on this week’s My Crazy Office Overtime show.
How can we communicate about mental health in the workplace effectively?
Listen to this week’s podcast here.
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Best Of: Critical, Controlling Bosses – My Crazy Office, Season 7
Kathi and Katherine talk about critical, controlling bosses on this week’s episode of the My Crazy Office podcast.
First we give advice to someone who is struggling with a new boss who corrects everything she does.
Then we ask what if you are a manager who is called a micromanager?
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Best Of: Uncertainty At Work: My Crazy Office Overtime, Season 7
Kathi and Katherine talk about uncertainty on this week’s My Crazy Office Overtime show.
How should you deal with uncertainty at work and in what ways can it show up?
Listen to this week’s podcast here.
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Best Of: When Life Events Change Priorities: My Crazy Office Overtime, Season 7
Kathi and Katherine talk about priority change on this week’s My Crazy Office Overtime show.
What happens when life events change your priorities and your job becomes less of a concern?
Listen to this week’s podcast here.
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Give Your Brain a Break
As we approach a holiday weekend and the rollout of summer, now is a good time to take concrete steps to give your brain a break. “A break from what?” You may ask. A break from being “on” and in hyper-alert mode for four months straight.
I’m willing to bet that most of our brains could use a break. For weeks now, they’ve been scanning the news, scrolling through apps, ingesting forecasts, responding to texts, sifting through email, sitting on video conference calls, monitoring chat threads, reviewing to-do lists, and ruminating over what we haven’t been able to accomplish at work.
Giving your brain a break is like taking a mental vacation. You want to let your brain rest and restore itself, rather than constantly pressuring it to react and respond to all of the information and tasks it’s been holding. Giving your brain a break is crucial because every mind needs time for reflection and regeneration. Your mind needs rest now so that it can help you do your best work and make your best decisions in the near future.
Here are a few simple (but not easy) things you can do to give your brain a break:
- Take a vacation from the news – Much of the news we ingest is designed to get our attention – it’s sensational. Overtime, it inflames and agitates the brain’s nervous system. If you can, refrain from consuming news for an entire day or a weekend. If you can’t do that, try limiting your intake to once in the morning and once in the evening.
- Take a break from social media – This means staying away from social media for a day or two. Some people take week-long breaks. Try taking a picture of your family and NOT posting it immediately. Or play a round of miniature golf, and don’t message anyone while you’re playing so that your brain can be present for the whole experience.
- Spend time in nature – Time spent in a natural setting walking, picnicking, hiking, swimming, biking or simply sitting and taking in fresh air is a balm for the brain. Listening to the sounds of nature – water rushing, birds chirping, leaves rustling – also helps the mind relax and refresh.
- Put your unsolved problems in a box – This technique is designed to help you let go of those problems that cannot be solved by ruminating on them. It’s an interesting exercise in letting go – if only for 24 hours. Write down an unsolved problem and put it in a physical box or container. Consider it an act of decluttering your brain. You will free up space for more creative ideas.
- Immerse yourself in music or art – Playing music you love, taking in art or photography or film that you are passionate about can relax your mind and release emotions. It’s especially helpful to the emotional sections of the brain that benefit from soothing sounds and beautiful images.
- Do something that makes you laugh a lot – Is there a movie you find hysterical? A writer who cracks you up? A comedian who you find endlessly funny? Maybe there’s a friend whose humor brings you to tears (of laughter). Laughter is a great release and relaxant for the brain. Whatever tickles your funny bone, do it.
During the last four months, our brains have been working overtime. We’ve used them to handle the pandemic, to respond to social, political and economic upheaval. We’ve used them to plan our days, take care of our loved ones, show up for work, and do the best that we can under strange and adverse conditions. I invite you to apply these ideas (or your own) to give your brain the rest it needs. It will thank you.
Katherine Crowley – Career Therapist and co-owner of K Squared Enterprises.
Contact us at info@mycrazyoffice.co for any further help around this topic.
Negotiating During a Pandemic
What are you negotiating for at work? Is it a promotion? A raise? Working from home full time? A new position? Working less? Changing teams? Retirement?
Whatever aspect of your work life you are currently negotiating, the pandemic makes an already unpredictable task more stressful then usual. Negotiating is not everyone’s favorite thing to do. It can be a sweat-provoking activity that causes many people to freeze and take what they are offered. Many of us don’t negotiate often enough to feel competent at it. So here is a crash course on how to negotiate – even in a pandemic.
1 –Prepare and Plan.
Know what you want. Know what you want in a perfect world and what you can live with in a pandemic world. Be realistic. This may require doing research.
2 – Clarify and Justify
Be direct and clear in your ask. Practice (on friends) asking for what you want. Get comfortable saying it. More importantly, come up with solid reasons for your ask. Is your request justifiable because of your market value? Does your promotion or raise make sense based on your accomplishments? Be ready with documents (sales reports, list of accomplishments, industry standards) that clarify and justify your position.
3 – Ask for more than you want
This can be challenging for those of you who are uncomfortable advocating for yourself. It’s important to ask for more than you want, as you will most likely not get what you initially ask for.
4 – Waiting and silence are important.
Do not speak or write again until you get a response to your initial ask. Quickly speaking or writing to fill in the blank space will show the other person that you are uncomfortable. This is when we inadvertently lower the bar for what we could get. Waiting is where the sweating comes in. If you come off too eager or desperate, you will not get what you want.
5 – Look for a Win/Win solution.
Both sides will want to win, so it’s okay to compromise. By being accommodating, you will be seen as a collaborator. Your negotiating partner will see you in a better light and will be more likely to strike a deal.
6 – Get closure in writing
Make sure to close the negotiation with some kind of written agreement. Whatever you are able to negotiate, get it in writing. Verbal agreements are nice but they don’t protect you from possible backsliding or misinterpretation over time.
DO NOT…
- Avoid. Do not use the strategy of avoidance, hoping the situation will resolve itself. Avoiding never works to your benefit. It may take the pain of negotiating away, but the result will be less than what you could have received if you’d stepped up and stated what you wanted.
- Play innocent. Put on your big adult pants and ask for what you want. No one else will do it for you.
Kathi Elster – Executive Coach and co-owner of K Squared Enterprises.
Contact us at info@mycrazyoffice.co for any further help around this topic.
Are Your Priorities Changing at Work?
The past few months of weathering the pandemic, and living with social, political and economic upheaval, have also acted as a time for reflection and reconsideration of what really matters to us. Where ever you are in your career, you may be re-calibrating your priorities.
As we enter the summer months and (hopefully) take some time to restore our bodies and minds, this could be a good time to reflect on what your priorities are, and how they may have shifted. After months of sheltering in place, weeks of home-schooling, and days of working remotely or not at all, what truly matters?
Here are some areas to consider:
Work hours
Before the pandemic, were you a constant worker bee? Did you look at work email before getting out of bed every morning? Did you refuse to take breaks or vacations? Were you the person who closed the office at night and worked every weekend?
Perhaps you have come to realize that such a compulsive approach to work took a toll on your body and mind, and interfered with your family life. Maybe now it’s important to incorporate breaks during the day, exercise during the week, and plan non-work activities over the weekend.
Eating habits
I know this may sound weird, but I can’t tell you how many people have told me that they’ve changed their relationship to eating and food. Pre-pandemic were you the king or queen of take-out? Did you purchase most of your meals via take out or dining out? Was your refrigerator a place to store cold water, leftovers, and batteries?
Perhaps, like many of the people I’ve spoken with, you’ve learned to cook and prepare meals at home. You actually like the experience of making your own food. Maybe you’ve become skilled at shopping for fresh produce and healthier snacks. Your new priority may entail continuing along this path, transforming mealtime to a more nourishing, creative experience.
Climbing the corporate ladder
Ambition and drive are a great thing. But a number of my clients have been reflecting on the cost of always trying to get ahead. Before the pandemic and the protests pointing to institutional racism, it was easy to simply believe that what mattered in terms of professional development was getting that next promotion, or successfully navigating company politics.
Today, you may be reconsidering the value of complying with company politics at the cost of your values. If equity, diversity and inclusion matter to you, it may be essential for you to participate in campaigns, meetings, education, company initiatives to address this issue. There may be other aspects of your company culture that you’re no longer willing to tolerate for the sake of advancement.
Family life
While it was easy pre-pandemic to give lip service to family life, many hardworking professionals felt a constant tension between fulfilling the demands of their careers, and tending to their families. They expressed regret for missing so many important moments at home but rationalized that the extensive travel and long hours at the office were a necessary evil in order to fund their lives. Were you one of those people?
These days, I’ve heard a number of professionals admit that while being grounded at home has been stressful in terms of juggling work, family, and personal time, they have also become better acquainted and more appreciative of every member of the family. Perhaps the new priority will be retaining and sustaining some of that family closeness by reducing time away for work.
These are just a few areas to think about. You may have other priorities that have come to your attention in terms of what matters to you now regarding your career, and the role work plays in your life. Whatever they are, I invite you to reflect on what matters to you this summer. Better priorities could be one of the gifts of these trying times.
Katherine Crowley – Career Therapist and co-owner of K Squared Enterprises.
Contact us at info@mycrazyoffice.co for any further help around this topic.
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