Is Someone Getting on Your Last Nerve?

My husband was noticeably irritated with me last night. He said that I was “yawn talking.” Do you know what yawn talking is? It’s when you keep talking even as you yawn. Apparently, I’ve been doing that a lot lately, and it’s extremely annoying.

My initial reaction after being accused of “yawn talking,” was to strike back. If I do that, then he “burp talks.” But that isn’t really the point. The point is, we’ve been sheltering in place for too long, and we’re getting on each other’s nerves. Critical words, verbal tics, grating habits, and nonverbal gestures that we might normally have shrugged off are getting to us.

You may find yourself in a similar situation. Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve heard numerous complaints from my clients about other people’s bad behavior. It could be a boss who is making more-than-usual unreasonable demands. A family member who is acting out. A coworker who is chronically late – even for Zoom meetings. Perhaps you have an upstairs neighbor who is playing loud music or moving furniture late at night.

None of these may be new behaviors, but they feel more irritating today. It’s the emotional by-product of extended captivity in the name of staying safe.

If your nerves are frayed, your temper is quick, and you feel overly reactive to the behavior of others, you are not alone. The question is, what can we do to calm our systems down?

Here are a few tips:

Shift your energy – I’ve said it before, and I will say it again. Confined living creates pent up energy which needs to be released one way or another. Run, jog, dance, squirm, have a pillow fight, take a bath, step outside, take ten deep breaths. Do something to shift the energy and relax your system. The more rigorous the movement, the better the release.

Ask yourself, “how important is it?” – If someone criticizes you, interrupts you, ignores you, makes a sarcastic remark, or offends you in some way, try to pause and ask yourself if it’s worth getting upset about. Is this a matter of life or death? Is your welfare truly threatened by this person/event/remark?

Let someone talk you off of the ledge – Sometimes you may know that you are over-reacting but you can’t help yourself. At these times, it’s smart to call a trusted friend or confidante, voice your complaint, and let them calm you down.

Try to find the humor – This isn’t always easy, but it’s well worth the effort. I am forever grateful to those people who can find the humor in difficult moments. Laughter relaxes the nervous system and puts small problems in their proper perspective. If you can find what’s funny in a tense exchange, both parties will benefit.

There is no miracle cure for our frayed nerves at this time. We don’t know exactly when we will be less confined, more mobile, less fearful. While we do our best to manage our lives during the pandemic, let’s all commit to doing what we can to soothe our over-worked nerves.

Katherine Crowley – Career Therapist and co-owner of K Squared Enterprises

Contact us at info@mycrazyoffice.co for any further help around this topic.

Finding the Essential in Your Work – The Measure of Who We Are is How We Make Ourselves Useful in Chaos

During this pandemic, it’s our essential workers who can travel and physically go to work while the rest of us shelter at home. We naturally and deservingly celebrate these dedicated and courageous members of our workforce. We are forever grateful to our medical workers, police and firefighters, EMT’s, transit workers, mailmen, package delivery folks, food delivery people, supermarket personnel, liquor store workers, military etc.

If you are not considered an essential worker today, that does not mean your work is not important and essential at other times. But, many of my clients are wondering how they can be of service at this time. Some are feeling sad that their work is not needed, and some are discovering what can be essential in what they are doing.

How do you become essential? By making your product or service useful to your customers at this time.

For example, you may want to offer your product or service at a very low cost today in order to insure business in the future. If you have a product, it might be time to put that product on sale to make it more desirable. If you are a hairstylist, fitness trainer or home organizer, you may want to reach out to your clients and see if you can help them do some maintenance with a video call. 

If you are a travel professional, it could be time to reach out to your customers and talk about future trends, or get them excited about what’s next. It’s best to stay in touch. Remember out of sight before you become out of mind.

Ask yourself:   

  • What will my customers need when we emerge – immediate & long term?
  • Should we package our work differently – maybe online?
  • Should we redesign our pricing to incentivize for a while?
  • How can we celebrate our business as essential and necessary?  
  • How can we make it available immediately for service or delivery?
  • How can we celebrate our customers with something that is essential? 

Think out of the box and be generous. Think Strategically:

  • Be useful
  • Be helpful
  • Be grateful
  • Be forward thinking
  • Be resourceful
  • Be creative and original

We are all in this together, and together we will get through this. All of our customers and clients will once again need us more then they need at this time. Business will resume. The economy will come back, and so will our work.

Kathi Elster – Executive Coach and co-owner of K Squared Enterprises.

Contact us at info@mycrazyoffice.co for any further help around this topic.